Slaying Dragons

Prayer has been a very difficult thing for me lately. I have noticed that where I could spend an hour or better journaling and praying, I am now giving toss up prayers throughout the day. I know that both styles of prayer are fine, but I am noticing a callous growing on my heart too and I don’t want a calloused heart.
Tonight I got a text from a friend that her dad has stage 4 lung cancer. I have never met her father, but my heart aches for her. I am so sick and tired of people getting cancer. I hate cancer. I have watched cancer eat away at dear friends and loved ones until there is just a shell left behind.
When I first heard about cancer I was in 4th or 5th grade and my grandmother, who had never smoked in her life, was diagnosed with lung cancer. It rattled my dad terribly that he could lose his mom when he was barely 30 years old. Thankfully, Gram had surgery to remove the portion of her lung that was cancerous and lived to be 95.
Cancer has won a few rounds though too. It took my great-aunt, who truly was great, when she was barely 71 years old. It has taken an uncle, and two dear friends who fought valiantly and tenaciously.
Cancer lost when it tried to take on my in-laws; first my father-in-law had cancer at the base of his tongue and then my mother-in-law was diagnosed with breast cancer. They were lucky and it was found early and it was treatable.
During all of these times I have prayed and prayed for the people who were sick. Asking God to heal them, to remove all of the cancer.
When my great-aunt was sick I found a Bible verse that talks about the Holy Spirit interceding for us when we pray with groans that our words cannot express. My heart is groaning even now.
I know that prayer is powerful and it can move mountains, it can bring healing, wholeness, truth, whatever. All things are possible with God. I know that prayer can slay dragons, I have seen it happen.
In my present state, I pray that my crusted heart will soften again and that I will once again be sitting at the feet of the One Who loves me best.
O Father, come in.
“Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus, just to take Him at His word, Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus, Oh for Grace to trust Him more…”

About gretchenr17

Wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. Writer, farmer, fellow sojourner... at every turn I learn a bit more about God's wild mercies.
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