Growing on Empty

The first quarter of school has come to a close. Grades are due and comments for the report cards are needed. Soon parents will be meeting with the teachers to discuss their child’s progress thus far. It has been a long nine weeks, full of learning, training, teaching, discussions, assessments, and book reports. I am tired, pleased, but tired. I have started to reflect on myself and my learning these past weeks.
I have been working late, sleeping little, and never feeling like I have had enough hours in the day. My to-do list has been added to, but never fully completed. Now, please hear me, I am not saying “woe is me, have pity on me.” Far from it. This is my season, I am embracing it fully. The reason I take pause is because I believe there is a better way. I love my job, my home, the work I do here at the farm. I just know I can do it better.
I know myself and I know that I need to fill my heart and mind up with Scripture and a time of solitude. I can set my alarm even earlier, but is that the answer?
I long for the quiet and contemplative mornings I use to have, but what I long for even more is time with God. I can feel the rush and the pull of all that I put on my to-do list, the “ought to do” things, the “should” things. And yet, I know I cannot grow on empty (see John 15:5, Proverbs 14:30a).

Heavenly Father, come into my spirit– my heart, mind, and soul in a way that calms me and helps me recognize the simple things again. Open my eyes to see the world with wonder and awe again. To be able to fall in love, all over again, with those who are already dear to me. I yearn for the sense that You are here, the way I used to sense You. I know You are with me whether I feel You or not. I just know I need You. More and more each day. Jesus meet me here. Fill me with Your peace, pour out Your gentleness, Your grace, over me.
Thank You, Jesus.

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About gretchenr17

Wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend. Writer, farmer, fellow sojourner... at every turn I learn a bit more about God's wild mercies.
This entry was posted in growing pains, reflections, Walking by Faith and not by sight and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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