This past week has been quite a whirlwind of activity, emotion, and wonder. I told my friend that it reminded me of when I was in labor with my second son.
When my water broke I called the doctor, giddy with excitement. I had been induced with my first son and did not go through labor “the usual way.” The doctor told me I sounded too excited to be in labor but to come to the hospital anyway.
He was right, I was too giddy to be truly in labor. The real labor didn’t start until about 45 minutes later, when my contractions were about 5 minutes apart. In the middle of pushing, which was hard, I knew it would all the be worth it. I was right, within a few minutes of deep labor I found myself looking at the precious face of my beautiful son.
My previous post, Doors and Windows, described a new situation that my family is in, moving to another state. I am beginning to feel the deeper pangs of labor. I’m realizing the faces I see every day will only be seen in my memory or on my Facebook feed. The views I see when I do my morning and evening chores on the farm will only be remembered by the photos I take on my iPhone.
I also realize though, that I need to embrace the pain, to keep breathing, to continue pushing, and trust that the outcome will be worth it all.
I have about six weeks left and I don’t want to let my goodbyes overwhelm my hellos. I don’t want my fear of what may come prevent me from embracing the blessings that come at the end of the struggle.
Psalm 37 says it best, “Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in Him and he will act” (verses 3-5).
I am going to keep on trusting, keep on delighting, and keep on committing myself to Him– through the pain– I know in the end I will be blessed.
Favorite topics in my journey2 Corinthians 5:17 believing Bible verses blessings broken & prickly people choices Christmas chris tomlin community courage death desiring God doubt Easter encouragement faith faithful faith journey family fear forgiveness found freedom God God's help God's plan grace gratitude growth habits healing Heaven Holy Spirit Honor Hope hymns James jeremiah 31:3 Jesus Jim Elliot John 16:33 joy kindness learning legacy letting go life listening loss lost lost and found love mercy Moses obedience Peace perseverance prayer promises of god Psalm 91 rest restoration rich mullins Romans 8:38-39 Romans 15:13 silence songs sorrow storms struggles teachable trials trust value wisdom