I have been walking with Christ for as long as I have known my husband, it’s one of the biggest parts of my faith. My faith journey is completely separate from him but it also runs parallel with him. During our history together, first as friends and then as husband and wife, I have fallen in love with him many times.
I fell in love with his heart and mind before I thought of anything else. We lived in other states and our courtship and friendship was through letters and phone calls. I learned that my husband wanted to care for me, but he also wanted a partner, not someone he had to care for like a small child. I was to be his equal. Over the years, I have fallen in love with him when I saw him holding our first son in the hospital. I have fallen for him when he stood by my side as I said goodbye to grandparents for the last time.
When we were engaged, my husband gave me a passage from Song of Songs to let me know how much he loved me. He made a point to woo me, even after he knew I was a sure thing. He wanted me to know I was important. I fell for him again and again.
Falling for my husband is something I choose to do every day. It isn’t a forced event, but a conscious decision to find things about him that I can celebrate and cherish. From the times he brings me a surprise at work, makes my favorite meal for no reason at all, or holds my hand as we fall asleep. I feel my face smiling and thinking of how precious he is to me and how treasured I feel by him.
Marriage is a hard thing to do well. I have watched couples I was certain were going to make it for the long haul, only to see them falter after a year or two. I have watched marriages survive the loss of a child, employment, and even homes. The key to all of it was the decision before the experience to stick together, no matter what. To make God the focus, not the after thought. Husbands and wives are to build into each other and help their partners reach their best. The world is very good at tearing people down. The home and marriage are places where we are to be safe enough to let our guards down and speak with honesty.
Best Beloved, how are you doing in your relationship with your partner and spouse? Are you choosing them above everyone and everything? Are you choosing to show them that they are important and what you treasure about them? How will they know if you don’t use your words? If your actions don’t support your words?
God designed marriage to be a tangible example of the relationship between Christ and the Church. Paul gave instructions to the church at Ephesus about marriage and the words still ring true today. Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God (verses 1 and 2).
Will you join me in choosing to love better? Even if the other person doesn’t choose to join you right now. May God give us the mercy and grace to make the choice to fall in love again.